Best thing I ever saw was:
Man and wife with two kids come down to launch their sib.
Man bellows instructions at humble and obedient wife.
“Plug that pump in there-no not there stupid, THERE”
“Put the oars in, load up the food AND the picnic basket, don't forget the wine”
and so on and so forth. Giving the minutest of instructions to everyone else, whilst doing nothing himself.
Eventually, after they place boat in water, he commands the two kids and family to stand back while he boards the sib.
It immediately starts to fill with water.
“You've not put the plug in the back” shouts the husband.
“Well, you didn't tell me to dear” calmly says the wife.
Collapse in mirth by the assembled watchers.
"Ribbing-the most expensive way of traveling third class"