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Old 07 September 2004, 06:40   #1
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"How many Ribnet Forum Members does it take to change a lightbulb.........."
Depends who was changing it really......

John Kennett... wouldn't need a step ladder.

JW... would want the house rewired, just in case.

Rogue Wave...it was probably him that broke it in the first place.

Phil Davies...would take some time as he would have to order a bespoke item from Italy and then worry about the length of it.

Jono Garton...would change it only after he had managed to get a box of bulbs at wholesale price.

Meme...would ask the forum for their opinions on the best type of bulb and whether he could claim salvage on the old one.

Louise...would change it but only after she had told everyone she didn't know anything about lightbulbs and would need third party insurance before she went up the ladder.

Manos ...would tell us that South African bulbs are best but then change his mind six months down the line...........



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Old 07 September 2004, 06:50   #2
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David Manning would stand by as safety officer.
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Old 07 September 2004, 06:58   #3
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Good one Dave.....

.......who, as Lou' has pointed out would stand-by as safety officer with a 2nd bulb in reserve along with every other watt/ampage/voltage known to man just in case - just in case and if heavens forbid he didn't have the one needed, he'd have detailed information on where one could be purchased.

Of course Jono (the pretender) would be on hand to offer comment, direction and advice on how the said bulb should be put in place
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Old 07 September 2004, 07:18   #4
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...
Of course Jono (the pretender) would be on hand to offer comment, direction and advice on how the said bulb should be put in place

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Old 07 September 2004, 07:53   #5
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.....not forgetting Ian, who'd see if he could find one on Ebay before travelling overnight to Scotland to pick it up;
....Codprawn, who will have tried every brand of bulb on the market, have a mate who runs a bulb manufacturing business in Monte Carlo, and insist that the only bulbs never to blow are those fitted to 30 year old Land Rover 110s;
....Richard B, who'd instigate a long-winded debate on the intricacies of bulb design with copious links to lightbulb chat forums;
....RichL, who'd video the entire event and then laugh uncontrollably as it shattered over everyone else's heads;
....Bilge Rat, who'd warn everyone of the potentially huge financial losses that can be incurred through the use of second-hand bulbs, but would be happy to recommend a suitable cleaning agent for renovating old bulbs;
....Alan Priddy, who'd attempt to set a world record for the fastest bulb change in history and then whinge like buggery because noone would sponsor him and nobody had the slightest interest in recognising his achievement;
.....and not forgetting Missus Jackeen, who'd start a thread on Ribnet 6 months prior to the aforementioned bulb change, tell everyone what a life changing experience it had been, write a poem about it, check 'Who's Online' and then bollock everyone who hadn't contributed to the thread
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Old 07 September 2004, 08:51   #6
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Holy Cow, this is....

..the best laugh I've had in an age, well apart from the other day when I was stalked by "Missus".

Phil...I'm sure our fellow members will bestow copious amounts of retribution. Bring it on........
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Old 07 September 2004, 09:36   #7
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Hang on a mo........

.............Who would eventually spot that it was the fuse that had blown?
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Old 07 September 2004, 09:40   #8
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Dave Manning, of course, coz he'd have transposed the working fuse for a duff one and set the whole thing up as a wind-up
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Old 07 September 2004, 09:47   #9
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No - No - No........

....Fred Bolton would have spotted it was a fuse as the cost of replacing a fuse is 4.653000 times cheaper than replacing the buld, however, whichever solution we chose John Firth would be on hand to assist - that is, as long as he had someone with him as he's not too experienced in such matters
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Old 07 September 2004, 10:09   #10
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Actually the answer to.......

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